Questions. Questions. Questions.
Can't We All Get Along?Zombie Rights march protested by pirates
Who's Serve Is It?Volleyball over the US-Mexican border
Aren't You A Cutie?
Toupees...for babies.
Are We There Yet?
Seattle to Olympia in 2 minutes
Get It? Get It?
Marmaduke cartoons explained
Remember These?
Vintage products for kids from the 50s to 80s
What Does It Look Like?
Your cell processes animated. Holy crap!
Did You Wash Your Hands?
Teaching kids hygiene the fun way
Oh. My. God. When Did You Get That?
Vintage Disney souveniers
Whatcha Watching?Full length cartoons available on YouTube
and finally...
What Time Is It?
Improvaganza
Last week I was sick as a dog, sleeping poorly and starting to stress out a bit about this thing that I can theoretically call an improv career...resulting in some way jacked-up dreams. Even though the actual memories of the dreams have faded, the feelings of unease they gave me still remain.
Ugh. Stupid subconscious. You suck. Big time.
Big Yellow Bus has had some light audiences and a cancelled show recently. I'm not too worried as September is one of those transition months--people are starting school, watching TV premieres and sliding into their autumnal/winter patterns. We're putting together a little marketing push for October that highlights BYB's 2-year anniversary in November. Not only that, the BYB crew convinced the president of the
Playground Theater to let us have FREE shows on Thursday for November and December. Hopefully, a new Thursday night tradition for performers and audiences alike will come out of this as well as a permanent free night on the PG schedule. My big hope is that Thursday night will pull nice size crowds who then become interested in seeing other shows at the theater. Here's hoping.
Chrysalis Clark has jumped back into rehearsals. A little rust and clunkiness after our brief layoff, but nothing a few weeks of work won't polish off. We're gonna tweak some things and polish others, using what we learned from our run at
IO earlier this summer. We're hoping to land another run at IO in January as well as start hitting the festival circuit. Starting up another improv rehearsal process, then adding some new things while working on the old things and still keeping the work solid and fresh is definitely a new experience to me as a director. I want to keep forging ahead and evolving but not at the cost of forgetting the basics of what we do. It's fun and scary all wrapped into one.
Speaking of scary, I should be sitting down with Beth Kligerman at
Second City hopefully next week to discuss some SC stuff. I want to meet with her and discuss TourCo, SC Detroit, my interest in working for SC in some capacity (performer, director, etc), specifically where I stand now and what I need to do to progress towards any of those goals. It's a bit stressful simply because, hey, I'm gonna go in and lay it on the line and who knows if I'll take a humbling hit or two during the discussion. Couple that with the fact it's the same week as the huge SC TourCo audition call in and it only highlights I'm one of hundreds of folks who want to work at SC and what the fuck do I think I can do better than, or at least as well as, so many other talented people.
I've got a couple of other pick-up directing gigs potentially swinging my way in the next couple of weeks as well as a pair of longer-term gigs starting up in the next couple of months, one is an Incubator and one is an ensemble of my own creation. Sadly, other than BYB, my performance schedule is sadly lacking. I honestly do think my stage chops are dulling from lack of weekly rehearsals with a director. I just don't know if I have the energy in me to wrangle up performers and forge a new ensemble...not a fuck around ensemble just to get stage time, but an honest-to-goodness "let's work hard and do something great" ensemble. I've flirted with the idea with hitting Mick Napier's, Rich Sohn's or Mark Sutton's Annoyance classes for a brush up, but if I'm gonna go back to class, why not take a session or two of ComedySportz classes, brush up my short form, and qualify for their yearly audition to boot? Either way, it'll take money, something that will be in short supply as I wind down at my job in the upcoming weeks...
Only 25 work days...
...left until I leave my job. Until then, links for everyone!
COCAINE: The Ultimate Energy Drink
WHY MOMMY IS A DEMOCRAT: A storybook for kiddies
PAPER, ROCK, SCISSORS: Big art, big cash and a simple game
GOLDEN BOOK OF CHEMISTRY EXPERIMENTS: Formerly banned book now available for free on the intrawebs. Related:
The Radioactive Boyscout, the boy who
tried to build a nuclear breeder reactor in his backyard at age 17.
TIMES TRAVEL: New York Times archives to 1851 are now available to subscribers.
X-PLAY: An actor's bad experience at G4's flagship show...
SCI FI EYE CANDY: Visual sci fi mag index. Cooler than it sounds.
Submitted for your approval
Unorthodox Taxidermy: Theodore Geisel, the World's Most Eminent Authority on Unheard-Of Animals.
Mario Wedding Cake: Bestest wife ever.
Drummer Prodigy: Tiny tyke, tremendous talent.
Anime Race: Wacky Racers, anime-style.
NYC Subway Smell Map: The sweet smell of city subways.
White and Nerdy
Weird Al Yankovic was the gateway humorist.
The
irreverent parody songs. The silly
polka mashups. The crazy getup. I was hooked on the unabashed nerdery of it all.
Once he infected my sense of humor, I was corrupted for good. I'd twiddle with my radio to catch Dr. Demento shows from Ann Arbor on Sunday nights. I'd spend my cash on whatever cassettes I could find at Sam Goody's or Musicland at Southland Mall...whether it be George Carlin or Richard Pryor or Bill Cosby or Eddie Murphy or Sam Kinison or Monty Python or whatever I could afford.
I would go on to write silly articles for the school paper, pull dumb pranks and be voted the class clown. I would even run for Homecoming Queen and almost be expelled from high school. I would grow older and still do silly bits and do funny things that were only funny to me, whether alone in front of the mirror or in front of full house on an improv stage.
And it all started with a nerdy kid who heard
"Like A Surgeon" on the radio and fell in love with this amazing thing called comedy...and it still makes me feel like that little kid all over again any time I hear his latest song.
Thanks, Al.
(Inspired by Weird Al's latest video, "White and Nerdy")
You can't have it all.
I'm a Japanese corporation! A corporation that owns Sega!
But wait a second...
Damn.
Wheeeee!
Nintendo Wii
promo video from Japan.
Wow.
Good combo! Bad combo!
Hey! You got your
Bloodsport in my Mentos!
You got your
Mentos in my Bloodsport!
Mmmmmmm...* * *
Hey! You got your
Audrey Hepburn in my AC/DC!
You got your
AC/DC in my Audrey Hepburn!
YUCK!!!
Studio 60
Can't wait to see Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip next Monday?
Me neither.
Clickity clack here to see the first episode online.
EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!
Auf'd!Too skinny models banned from Madrid Fashion Week!
Bond!He's one bad mother-- Shut your mouth! I'm just talkin' 'bout Bond, James Bond!
Brent!
Microsoft Training video featuring David Brent of The Office!
Darkon!Adrenalized nerds with pointy objects!
Doh!
Butterfinger astronauts!
Light!This ain't your father's Hypercolor!
Safety net? Just jump!
This morning I couldn't stop smiling.
I even laughed out loud a couple of times.
I was 3 hours late for work.
When I got in, I went to my boss's office and gave my notice.
I'm finished the last week of October.
I don't have a jobby job lined up.
I don't have any cash stashed.
I don't have any real plan in particular.
And I don't care.
I'll figure it out as go along.
And not knowing, not caring and just jumping into uncertainty feels great.
Assorted Silliness
Savor the nuances of 300 different versions of the
Popcorn Song.
* * *
Behold the beauty of
Tiki Art!
* * *
Bask in the crayola explosion of color and creepatacular hornilicious A.D.D.
video for the Japanese-only PS2 game, Super Galdelic Hour. (About 2 minutes or so into the video, the "gameplay" begins.)
* * *
Submit to
Nine Inch Nails/Star Trek, a slashfic video mashup gone horribly hilarious.
* * *
Chill to an
acoustic cover of Outkast's "Hey Ya!" that, unbelievably, is pretty good!
* * *
Finally...
THE. BEST. MUSIC. VIDEO. EVER.
Knights of Cydonia
...And Still Yet Once Again...
The Ghost of TourCo Auditions Past (Interlude)And so, the next audition will be my sixth go at it; I've auditioned three times for SC-Chicago and twice for SC-Detroit.
Lucky number six, here I come...
...And Still Yet Again...
The Ghost of TourCo Auditions Past (pt 4)Just a month later, in February 2005, SC-Chicago held another audition.
" I'm blanking out, but I think this upcoming SC Audition will be my fifth or sixth for SC (two in Detroit, two or three in Chicago). SC supposedly tracks your progress from audition to audition, so if anything, I just hope to put in a good audition and that's that. Auditioning for Detroit and auditioning for Chicago are such different beasts for me--Detroit was my shot at going home a conquering hero while Chicago is just...I dunno...just another audition in Chicago.
You know what's hilarious? People try so hard to get to the mainstage they never think about what happens after you're done with SC...or SC is done with you. There's a performer who did SC TourCo and SC e.t.c. That person still does improv in Chicago...
...but they are now a waiter in a restuarant in my office building.
If that doesn't keep you humble, nothing else will.
* * *
It only took two days (out of four) to fill up all the audition slots--several
hundred audition slots.
* * *
I left work early and caught a cab up to Second City.
I hit Old Town Ale House and slugged down a Guinness while chatting with Shelby and Kara (who just auditioned) and then swung over to the theater. After checking in, I chatted and bitted with some of the folks I knew. I forgot how fun pre-Audition bits can be. Andy St. Clair called the 3:25 pm group over and took us to warm-up. Of the 7 other folks I'd be auditioning with, I knew 2--Steve Waltien and Piero Procaccini...my roommate. Hilarious. Of the hundreds of people I could audition with, I end up in the same group as my roommate.
After a few brief warm-up games, we went back outside and soon Beth Klingerman called us into the Skybox. And away we go.
Line up on stage.
Say name and one non-theater fact about yourself.
Quick slew of scenes.
Longer two-person scenes.
Done.
In the slew, Mick would call your name, you'd start a scene and someone would join you. Scene would go on until Mick calls it. I just went in, did a few different characters and that was that.
When the two-person scenes rolled around, Mick had us sit down and told us he'd call two folks up to do a longer scene. I could have swore he said they'd be about "a minute long." In past years, they didn't really quantify it. A minute? It turned out to be more "as long as Mick wants to watch your scene"--but at least you had the knowledge your "longer" scene might not actually be all that long.
Mick called the first pair up. OK. Six left. Who could I be paired with? Please let it be Steve or Piero. Nah, that won't happen.
Mick called the second pair up. Huh. Still have a shot at doing a scene with either Steve or Piero. That'd be nice.
Mick called the third pair up, with Steve being one of the two. Well, there you go, I rarely see Piero at home and have never done a scene with him ever, and now our first scene together will be at SC TourCo auditions. Dig it. Sneaking a look at Mick, scribbling notes on a sheet of paper, I wonder if he put us together on purpose.
Mick finally calls Piero and I up. Instead of a location like the three other pairs, we get a relationship. Piero drives the scene with some great choices and I go along for the ride.
And like that, it's done.
We head out of the theater. I say howdy to a few folks and then go back to the Old Town Ale House for the traditional post-audition drink up. Shelby, Kara, Steve Waltien, Marc Ovies, Erin Davidson, Dunbar Dix, Josh Chamberlain, Katie Neff all end up over there.
So, another year, another audition.
Now back to the improv trenches!"
(Piero is currently my roommate and does a ton of directing work for SC. Katie Neff is the girlfriend of my and Piero's ex-roommate, Steve Kaminski, and she currently performs with SC-Las Vegas.)
...And Yet Again...
The Ghost of TourCo Auditions Past (pt 3)In January of 2005, SC-Detroit held auditions for Mainstage/TourCo. I scheduled a slot, rented a car and made my way back home...
"By 7:15 am, I had picked up the car, rounded up a fellow improvisor and was on the road towards Ann Arbor. My friend sacked out to Dar Williams and I drove us into the misty Michigan morning.
During the long quiet drive, I stared out into the thin mist shrouding the countryside and briefly imagined this was my metaphorical crossing into the Underworld. I was the archetypal improvisor with a thousand faces.
Then I laughed at how stupid that was.
Then I considered it some more.
Then I yawned and forgot all about it.
Sleep deprivation and stress does weird things.
I cut it close, but I managed to park and make it to the theater by my check in time--almost 12 on the dot. A sign pointed me up a steep flight of wooden stairs to a space above Improv Inferno (Dan Izzo, owner of the Improv Inferno and former Chicagoan, had graciously donated his space for SC Detroit auditions). A few people were scattered around the cluttered room, although there was an area for us to warm-up, the space was under renovation. I checked in with a pair of ladies at at folding table and found I had a few minutes to kill, so I jaunted across the street to Starbucks for a water and a mocha, chatted with some Chicago people and came right back.
My group was small. Only 5 people! (In Chicago, your SC audition group would probably be 8 folks.) Not only that, I knew Jen Malinsky, and was introduced to another Chicago improvisor Josh Eakright. Since we all were from Chicago, we yapped a bit about things going on back home. I found it funny because the CIN boards were quiet about the audition--no one really has brought it up and I hadn't heard much around about other peeps heading out for this audition, so to have a couple of performers from home in the group was nice.
Kathy, one of the check in ladies, warmed us up in with quick rounds of stretching, Eights and a circle warm-up that combined name games and passing the clap. While warming up, the previous audition group came clambering up the stairs to collect their belongings. I spied yet another Chicago performer, Thea Lux, and an old Detroit face, Ken Wood. Kathy left us with the note that the auditors specifically mentioned they wanted to see character work and that playing any favorite characters you had in the audition was A-OK.
Sidenote: One of the things I noticed as the day wore on was the interpretation of the "show clothes" directive for the audition--the Detroit folks I knew really dressed up for the audition with dress pants, dress shirt, tie and jacket (TourCo/Mainstage standard) whilst most of the Chicago peeps seemed to stick with simple black clothing or business casual (comfortable but classy IO/PG standard).We walked downstairs and entered the Improv Inferno proper. It's a long, narrow space but definitely had a cool vibe about it--even empty on a Tuesday at 12:30.
We took to the small, elevated wooden platform and lined up. Marc Warzecha introduced himself. He would be leading this audition. We were told to step forward, introduce ourselves, say where we were from and then tell one non-improv, non-theater fact about ourselves. For my intro, I mentioned how my dad was a Sunni muslim from Palestine and my mom a Roman Catholic Filippino and, surprise, they are divorced. While everyone else did their intros, I scouted the auditors. Even though they were in the dark, they were only about 15 feet away from us. Hello, intimate. I recognized Kirk, a former SC-Detroit Mainstager, was pleasantly surprised to see Beth Klingerman from SC-Chicago. The fourth person, I think was a lady and I'm guessing that's the new executive producer for SC-Detroit.
I did a super-quick auditor check off in the my head--I know 3 of 4 the auditors, 2 of which have only seen me at Chicago auditions and the third who hasn't seen me perform since I left Detroit. While it didn't affect my approach to my audition, it did make me comfortable level by knowing who was there watching.
I also knew that this slot was the last audition of the morning and the auditors were going to have lunch next. Theoretically this is the slot to avoid because the auditors are probably burnt out and thinking about getting some grub. Since choosing an audition slot was out of my control, all I can do is simply acknowledge that I have to work a little harder to make an impression...and with any luck be a pre-lunch highlight.
We started out with a quick slew of scenes--Marc would call out someone's name, that person initiate a new scene and then somebody else would join them. My scenework itself was meh, but I made sure the instant my name was called I would say something, ANYTHING, as I came off the backline and strode downstage--long, deliberate pauses at the top of a scene during a slew come across as stalling or fear, so I made sure I seized the stage. I also did my best to mix it up when I could. A few bits and a few characters later and that was that.
Then, we switched on over into longer two-person scenes. We were paired off by Marc and did our stuff in turn. The suggestion of "Art Fair" was given to me and my partner. I made a quick decision that I wanted to break beyond the boundaries of the small stage, so I walked off the platform at the top of scene. But instead of pushing and furthering the choice I made, I rooted myself to one spot just offstage. Blergh. Follow your instinct and
follow through with your instinct. Other than the strange staging, I thought scene was alright.
Usually to wrap up a typical SC audition, you close with Freeze Tag if you have time, but Marc instead hit us with Conducted Story. I was a little surprised but absolutely game for it. I was lucky and blessed with "Jack Kerouac" as my style for storytelling. I say blessed because while I don't read much beat poetry, but I love spoken word. So, still miffed for not following my instincts in the two-person scene, I pushed and pushed hard into stream-of-consciousness freestyle associating. I committed my balls off and it felt great. It felt even better being the story teller that closed it out. Hopefully it was a nice high note for the morning audition session to end on for the auditors.
* * *
During the lunch break, Dan Izzo gave a couple of us a tour of his theater and we chatted improv/theater biz. (Again, it's an awesome space I'll do my best to get some pix.)
* * *
That afternoon, we ran into Brett Lyons and Erica Noschang and decided to grab a quick dinner after everyone's Erica's auditions. It was great, just fucking great, to have a solid audition and then go and bullshit over food with funny folks. 240 miles from home and we're doing bits, being silly and cracking our shit up, all after an audition that could really be a stepping stone in our improv careers.
To be honest, that dinner was the highlight of the trip.
Screw the audition.
* * *
Every minute feels like an eternity.
The worst part is waiting.
* * *
At 4:17 pm on Thursday, January 6th, 2005, the Corner Man of my ego threw in the towel.
The Corner Man had held onto towel, against his better judgment, from 1 p.m. until 4:16 p.m. Knowing my battered ego could take no more, the Corner Man finally let fly and watched the bloody towel arc onto the canvas.
The Contender was no champ, not this time, the Corner Man thought, but he was still a fighter...and there are still many other fights on many other nights yet to come.
But
this fight was over.
This night was done.
And no matter what lessons were learned, what wisdom the Corner Man would spout, the Contender would only think that a loss is still a loss...and some hurt way more than others."
(Erica Noschang would go on to perform at Boom! Chicago. Strangely enough, tonight, September 10th, is the last night the Improv Inferno will be open at that space. The landlords jacked the rent up on Dan Izzo and he decided to relocate elsewhere.)
...And Again...
The Ghost of TourCo Auditions Past (pt 2)October of 2003 was my next audition for SC-Chicago's TourCo. From my old journal:
"On Sunday, I took an audition workshop taught by Liz Cackowski. Not only did she give us great insight into the audition process, she also gave us tools and strategies to take into the audition itself. It was very enlightening--especially for someone like me who hasn't auditioned in two years because I cast and produce my own little improv projects. This is a good time to be auditioning because there are only two understudies right now, two Tour Co people are leaving soon and (unofficially) another two are planning to leave also. So, all three Second City Touring Companies will be looking for people.
One of the most surprising things was the caliber of performers who were taking the workshop. I was really surprised at who was in it. Performers who rock my world also were there to pick up tips and pointers along with the audition newbies. It definitely made me feel a bit better about being rusty at auditioning and having to take a workshop.
Tuesday morning I strut my stuff.
Cross those fingers folks.
* * *
Magnificent Bastards. All of 'em.
* * *
I left work at 10 and made it over to Second City via the Brown Line around 10:30. On the way to Piper's Alley, where all the SC theaters are located, I ran into some people I knew (Rebecca Hanson, Chad Reinhart, Scott Goodman, Angela Faruggia) who had just auditioned. We chatted a bit and went our separate ways. I went to Starbucks, ran into another improvisor (Erin), grabbed the Trib's sports section and tried to forget why the hell I was there.
No dice.
Every time I looked out the window, it seemed like I saw an improvisor I knew. Every time I closed my eyes and tried to focus on something, anything (!), other than improv all I could do was think of initiations and characters and scenes and what ifs and what thens.
So I gave up.
I just sat there, nibbled on my Banana Nut Bread, slurped my Grande Soy Mocha (with whip) and let my mind wander. I knew there was no way to rein in my nervous A.D.D. brain, so I tried to enjoy anxiety-induced ride while the bank clock on the other side of Wells took forever to reach 11:15 a.m.
I knew how I wanted to attack this audition. I knew that I would be playing with people I was familiar with (but didn't know exactly who just yet). I knew who would be auditing us. I knew that I would be nervous no matter how cool and casual I wanted to be.
I finally left Starbucks and took the escalators up to the top floor of Piper's Alley. John Lutz's laughter echoed down from Donny's Skybox "lounge" area. (Lutz, a current Tour Co performer, would be our warm-up/advice guy for the auditions.)
After checking in, I finally found out who I would be auditioning with. Eric Rutherford. Marc Ovies. Shelly Gossman. Ryan Gowland. Katie Nahnsen. Cesar Jamie.
The last couple of weeks, I had made it a point not to find out who I would be playing with...it was a superstition thing. Now that I knew who I was with, I was totally blown away by who I would be doing scenes with--I knew everybody and everybody was a damn fine player! We chatted and yapped for a bit before Lutz took us next door to the Training Center and to warm us up. We did a simple name game / "yes" exercise. Lutz then gave us a little advice on the audition and told us that we were very lucky to be playing with such a talented group of people in our audition. He was about take us back out to the Skybox when a new person, that none of us knew, arrived.
Lutz had mentioned someone was running late earlier, but I forgot about it once warm-ups began. Well, here she was. I felt a bit awkward--everyone in the group had either played with each other in the past, currently performed in an ensemble with one another or at least hung out socially...and now this girl was stepping into this unknowingly. Not only that, she had missed the warm-ups and the banter of earlier. We did a quick round of introductions and then stepped out into the Skybox lounge.
Beth Klingerman popped out from the theater to grab our headshots and told us it'd be a few minutes.
Waiting for Beth to come out again felt like forever.
During that wait, that's when it hit; that's when it all felt real--that I was auditioning for Second City. After years of training and performing, I finally felt comfortable auditioning again at Second City and this was my moment to step out and serve notice that I was a solid player.
During the sleepness night before, I thought about some of my improv heroes who have never performed at Second City, like Joe Bill, Mark Sutton and Paul Gronde. You don't need SC to succeed, but it's definitely a rush to be a part of such a storied organization.
The other underlying motivation I had was to have a solid audition in front of Marc Warzecha (former SC Detroit Mainstage, current TourCo director) and Nancy Hayden (also former SC Detroit, current SC Detroit producer). None of the people who I really looked up to in Detroit who have moved to Chicago have seen me perform. I really wanted to do well just to show that, hey, I came out here, put in the time and I'm doing alright...and if I ever moved back to Detroit, maybe I could leverage a solid audition into a SC Detroit TourCo understudy gig.
Beth came back out and we headed into the Skybox.
Mick Napier was running the audition. Even though Mick's not a current SC director or performer, SC respects him enough to have Mick run things. We got on the stage, listened to Mick's quick audition advice spiel and began the standard SC audition--intros, quick scenes, slower two-person scenes, pick-up scenes.
To start an SC audition, the group lines up on the stage. One by one, the performers introduce themselves by saying their names and then revealing one non-theater related fact about themself. I ended up being the last one and went with, "My name is Sammy Tamimi. My mother is Filipino. My Father is Palestinian. And at least once a day, no matter where I am in Chicago, the Loop, in a restaurant, wherever, some one tries to speak Spanish to me. I'm trying to teach myself Italian, but I'm considering learning Spanish just to make my life easier."
Eric Rutherford, bless his heart, simply said, "I'm Eric Rutherford and I want a saxaphone."
Intros complete, Mick began the audition in earnest...
* * *
The first part of the audition is simple.
The 8 performers form a backline. Mick calls out a name. That person steps forward to do a scene. Anyone can join them. Mick will call scene and then name someone else to for the next scene. That's it.
These are quick scenes, not necessarily bitty but definitely gamey. Mick even told us that this would be the time to take chances and that we should show our range of characters--we would be doing slower scenes later.
Tips culled from the Audition Workshop and from veteran improvisors about this part of the audition:
*Your first line should be about you, your partner or the environment*"I'm so in love with you!" "You don't look so good..." "Your yacht is magnificent!" etc. Establish the who, what and where --and the game-- early. The scene won't last that long but you need hit the basics hard and fast.
*Make strong choices*Have an emotion. Have a physicality. Take a chance. Endow yourself and give your partner something to play off of. But remember...
*Keep it simple*Simple ideas and simple initiations are best. You don't have time to puzzle out a complicated initiation or off-kilter response.
*Play a range of characters*Be aware if you're playing the same type of character over and over. You'll get 3 or 4 chances to switch it up at the top of the audition so take advantage of that opportunity.
(Some people have told me that this part of the audition is the place to showcase the types of characters you do well--it's not cheating by playing a character type you do well (dumb jock, midwest mom) because you're still improvising; you're just showing to the auditors your character range.)So, Mick begins the round of short scenes...
...and I get a little rattled.
As I watch scenes fly by, I realize I'm not getting out there. Sometimes I start to step forward, see someone else also moving and I let 'em go on instead. When I get out there, the scene gets called pretty quick. I return to the backline not liking what I just put out there. I start to worry about how I'm standing on the backline. Is my posture defensive? Am I blocking anyone? Am I paying enough attention? These are among the things that battle with my stage focus. I watch my fellow auditioners rock out and attack the stage. I get out a couple of more times and feel good about one scene out of the bunch.
Mick ends the first part of the audition. He has us sit in the front row of the theater and introduces the next part of the audition, the two-person scene. He'll name two people. Those people will take the stage, get a suggestion and do a two person scene for a couple of minutes.
I sit down and manage to rally my focus while the first scene is going on. The first part of the audition is over and done with, I tell myself. Gotta just go out and do a good scene. That's all that matters.
I get called up second with Ryan Gowland. Candy Store owner and Candy Store customer scene with the simple game of he knows I'm filching candy and I try to distract him with flattery or whatnot. Fun scene that I take my hat off to Ryan for setting up and driving home. I came off the stage feeling good about that scene and knew, that if anything, at least I was in a good two-person scene.
While the two-person scenes are going on, I heard Mick moving around the room, checking in with (I assume) the TourCo directors. After all 8 people have cycled through, there's usually time for a couple more scenes and the people the TourCo directors or Mick want to see again go up for another two-person scene. Being called up is neither a good thing or a bad thing--for whatever reason, they want to see you improvise some more (which can be good, but if you tank it, that can be bad).
After a pair of extra scenes (I was in neither), Mick thanked us and let us know that the calls would go out Wednesday night and callbacks would be Friday.
With that, we left the theater and went back to the lobby.
We stood around chatting and talking about the audition--there were some hot, hot scenes cooked up by this crew. A couple of us went to the dive bar known as the Ale House and had a couple of beers, spending the first few minutes lost in that quiet and weird relief/contemplation limbo that follows an audition. Drinking a couple pints on a nearly empty stomach got me a bit buzzed.
After catching a train with Andrea Swanson (and comparing audition notes and discusing KOKO biz) , I finally made it back to work by 2 pm. I had been gone 4 hours. I hid in the back room and replayed and analyzed the audition in my head until 5 rolled around. Office productivity yesterday was near zero. I treated myself to Kill Bill after work and called it an early night when I got home--I was emotionally and physically drained.
And now, a day later, I still cringe a little bit when I think about my audition. I'm sure it was par for the course--nothing spectacular but nothing atrocious either. I feel like I could have done much better, but I'm glad I had a good scene with Ryan to remember this year's audition by.
Now, I'm not hopeful about getting a phone call from SC for callbacks...but I am hopeful for all my friends...
* * *
On the Red Line home from work, I run into Tony Seales. We compare audition notes and chat. He hopes he gets called back but doesn't think he will. We part ways at Addison.
I head over to the Currency Exchange by Cornelia and Broadway because ComEd doesn't think I'm real. Well, they didn't put exactly that way, but that's how it came out. When I called ComEd to get the electric in my name, I was told I had to go to a Currency Exchange to fill out an application to prove I was who I said I was. Huh? Probably some roundabout way of saying, "You have shitty credit. We want your info on file."
For those of you who don't know what a Currency Exchange is, it's basically a run-down storefront financial institution that makes a profit from various transactions. They can cash checks, write money orders, directpay utility bills for you, make change, etc., but they tack on service charges that add up. They also sell CTA passes, parking stickers, license plate renewals, phone cards and other things a Chicago person might need.
The person who uses the Currency Exchange the most is the one who can least afford it--usually the poor, indigent or illegal who can't (or won't) have an account at a bank are the ones who most likely to use a local Currency Exchange for all their financial needs. And since the Currency Exchange makes money off every transaction...
After filling out the ComEd application and paying $2.50 to have it processed, I decided to hop on the old weighing scale that cost only a nickel.
280 lbs.
On the nose.
(C'mon body, let's find a new, lower setpoint for ourselves, ok?)
I waddled over to Salt & Pepper, running into and walking with a lady improvisor part of the way. I loved the fact that she had a 12-pack of beer and a grocery bag full of chips. I offered to carry the beer for her, but she declined ;)
And, of course, we talked about SC auditions.
She had a great story--In Starbucks, right before she was to audition, her belt broke. Her pants were loose and would show her underwear if she bent over or moved too much and she was beginning to panic. Luckily, a male improvisor who she knew just happened to be in Starbucks--he had already auditioned earlier in the day! And like the true gentleman he was, he loaned her his belt for the audition.
Yes and... and support, people! Ain't it beautiful?
I rolled into S&P and stuffed myself into a booth. Tony Seales came in a little later and sat in the booth behind me. I read my Onion and had my coffee. He read his copy of Something Wonderful Right Away.
His cellphone rang. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but the way he answered and the manner in which he spoke really caught my ear. I turned around and looked at him. Through his replies I figured it out.
He was getting called back!
I was beyond psyched! Not even 2 hours ago he said he didn't think he'd get called back and that even if he was, he'd being onstage at ImprovOlympic and wouldn't know until way later. And, at random, here he was at Salt & Pepper reading his Second City history book, waiting for his IO team and he gets the call from Beth Klingerman. Rock!
After he hung up, I gave him a high five and congratulated him. I went back to my booth and when April, the S&P waitress, walked by I leaned over and whispered to her that I would be buying Tony's dinner that night--it was my way of saying congrats :)
After that, I tried to read my newspaper. I was way happy for Seales but I was also a little sad inside--I knew I wouldn't getting that call, not that I deserved it, but it still stung to know that.
Well...there's always next year.
I hope."
(Not only did Tony get called back, he got hired as an understudy! From my audition group Ryan Gowland would go on to perform with Boom! Chicago. Shelly Gossman would get picked up for TourCo and is currently at SC-Las Vegas. Eric Rutherford would also get picked up and do the TourCo thing. Katie Nahnsen can be seen Sports Action Team on NBC.)
...Try, Try Again...
The Ghost of TourCo Auditions Past (pt 1)Sometime in 1998 was my first TourCo audition, for SC-Detroit, back when they had a TourCo...and were actually located in Detroit. I had just finished Level 1, so I'll let you imagine how bad it was.
January, 2001 was second TourCo audition, my first for SC-Chicago. From my old journal about that audition:
"Re-read
Peter’s advice to those auditioning for TourCo. Reminded myself that almost no-one gets it on their first try. Promised to make a proper resume for future auditions. Tried to focus myself on positive thoughts. Honestly, I just wanted to have a solid audition—I wanted to represent myself well. What you want and what you get are two different things…
I got off work early and traveled up to SC from the Loop. I was starving, so I decided to catch lunch at Boston Market. Guess what…that’s right…ran into more improvisers! I sat down with Bob Ladewig and Paul O’Toole and some people they knew and we just bullshitted for a bit.
Bob was one of the first people I met out here…he was also one of the first improvisers I met —he was working at Borders and I had my SC Detroit hat on. We started talking about improv and I found out he was on the Rooftop Players who were in the middle of their record setting Cagematch run (like 15 or 16 wins). He’s one of my favorite people to talk to and one of my favorite improvisers to watch. Plus, he’s an all around good guy who just got engaged to his 7-year(!) girl friend (she’s 22, you do the math).
They left and I had lunch, then caught a mocha-something at Starbucks. I went up to the SC E.T.C. theater for my audition.
Basically, there was a lone table set up with some water and a piece of paper telling auditioning improvisers what was up. Among my auditioning group was Tim Chidester, Stacy from
Dinner of Six, a guy from
Salsation (who I always talk to when one of us is drunk).
It was hard to relax. I mean, you got Chidester dancing around, warming himself up and this huge mural of SC alumni hanging over your head—so between glances at Tim and the weight of Belushi, Candy and Short pressing down on me, it was a miracle I didn’t scream. I felt bad when one of the other auditioners (Joe? Joel?) asked if I wanted to do warm up scenes and I said no...I just wasn't in the right frame of mind just yet.
A lady came out, took our resumes and headshots (or in my case, made a disappointed “oh” noise when I said I didn’t have one) and led us into the theater.
As we took the stage, I looked out at the first row of evaluators and saw TJ Jagodowski, which made me warm and fuzzy ‘cuz he’s a cool guy. I’d like to say I didn’t care who evaluated us, but it’s reassuring to know someone you like is out there.
Mick Napier stepped forward and asked us to say one thing about ourselves not related to improv or theater. The topper from the 6 of us? A guy had just returned from the Israeli army where he had blown up a dog with a rocket launcher.
No shit.
Apparently, to confuse infrared thermal sights, Hezbollah guerillas crawl on all fours and tie on a “tail”—pretending to be a dog (while having a rocket launcher of their own strapped to their back). So, Joey shot the dog 'just in case' it was a guerilla.
It was a big dog.
It pretty much stopped the audition in its tracks. He was fifth and Stacy was sixth. Jesus. Glad I wasn’t last. She was like, “I don’t think I could top that.” So she said was from Kentucky and Mick made some comment how they were both from Hazzard county and made some joke and everyone laughed.
We did some quick scenes—Mick calls out a name and that person starts a scene and someone else joins them. I was in three I believe. I remember thinking how my first two characters were kinda low-status/low-energy/clingy types and that I wanted to shift gears for the third time out with a contrasting character. I can’t remember if I made it out again.
After a few minutes of this, we switched gears and took seats in the audience as two selected improvisers went up to do longer scenework. While sitting in the audience and with no stagelights in my eyes, I saw Josh Funk and Gelman among others watching the auditions. There must have been like 10 – 15 people watching the audition (not all were evaluating, but that’s sure a lot of people).
Anyways, I go up with Joey (Joel?), the Israeli Defense Force guy. We did a scene in a greenhouse where we grew pot. Very plotty and kinda blah. The only laugh was on the out line.
(Tangent--about laughs in auditions: I don’t care if I get laughs. I hope I do, but I don’t care if I don’t if my partner and I did good, involving scenework. However, it’s like insult to injury if you do a sucky, non-funny scene. It’s the silence after the scenes I’ve done lately that kills me. It’s not that good silence, the kind that means an audience was riveted and enthralled, but the bad silence, the kind that hangs there heavy and uncomfortable because everyone has now lost 5 minutes of their life to bad improv.)
Chidester did well. So did the girl he knew. The guy from Salsation did a scene with Stacy that was textbook on finding the game in a scene and heightening the fuck out of it. I was laughing hard at it.
And that was that. I didn’t even check my watch to see how long we went. I’m gonna guess maybe 20 minutes. I walked out, said howdy to bunch people I knew and shuffled out into the cold. Honestly, I gave serious thought to going and getting shitfaced I was so bummed at my performance."
(Bob is one of the nicest and funniest people you could ever know. Say howdy to him, you won't be sorry.)
If at first you don't succeed...
Second City announces TourCo Auditions.
First Reaction: Anxiety
Second Reaction: Resignation
Third Reaction: Amused Reminiscence
Fourth Reaction: Hope
ANXIETY
This is an audition for
Second City.
RESIGNATION
Crap, this is my
sixth audition for Second City.
AMUSED REMINISCENCE
Crap, this is my sixth audition for Second City
and, man-o-man, were some of those true stinkeroonis.HOPE
Crap, this is my sixth for Second City and, man-o-man, were some of those true stinkeroonis
but what the hell, I'll give it another go. Who knows what will happen.
If I don't put myself out there, only one thing is for sure
......
nothing will happen.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And just who the hell am I?
Sammy Tamimi, a performer/director/producer by night, Chicago nerd/layabout by day.
Professionally: Trained at
Second City-Detroit,
Chicago City Limits, ImprovOlympic,
Second City-Chicago and
The Annoyance. Taker of many workshops, maker of many more, producer of a couple shows, performer in a crap ton more.
Personally: I've washed dishes, bussed tables, served food, rented cars, messengered packages, rented pool tables, made pizzas, rented tennis courts, given plasma, coached tennis, delivered bread, temped offices, monitored newscasts, collected unemployment, admin assisted and drove an airport shuttle bus in circles until I wanted to scream. I've worked first shift, second shift, third shift, doubleshift and doubletime. I've been hired & fired, re-hired & re-fired, been laid off or have walked out or just never showed up again. And these are just the ones I remember...
...and I've probably made more in a month or two at any of those jobs than I have earned in my whole improv career.
Yet here I am.
An improvisor in Chicago.
(title courtesy of Chicago son, Carl Sandburg)
And so it begins...again.
After 6 years of blogging in a
journal or
two, you'd figure I'd be done with all this hoohah.
You figured wrong.
